Thursday, January 14, 2010

Enter the Dragon

Tell me this isn’t the most auspicious name for a holy pally loot.
mmmkay, here’s a few more ideas blizzard:

[Hood of Negative Armor] for bear tanks
[Shield of Unmitigated Crushing Blows] for prots
[Cloak of Resisted Dots] for warlocks

Sounds pretty palatable, no?
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We should have gotten Insanity, but we went into phase 3 with the Exhaustion debuff. It was my fault-- I forgot that taking my shirt off triggers global Heroism.

Our pro MT grabbed Anub by the balls and whipped him around like it was nothing to worry about. I told him that was some legit maneuvering skillz, and he said “Nah man, tanking’s easy. I don’t even have a mouse-- I use my laser printer to strafe around.”

If you find whatever you’re tanking is giving you the stress worthy of loots and attention, you’re an amateur unfit for tanking. Go roll a ret pally and kill cobras in sholozar basin.
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I once received a scam blizzard email that looked so real. It was uncanny. I hope the scammer go DIAF, but I wasn’t angry. I appreciate his respect for my intelligence--the guy put in a lot of effort to legitimize the look and feel of that email.

On the other hand, I am pissed at Ecwhcxejb. I'm sure he has no intention of compromising my account, but he’s got no respect for me. He thinks I’m so stupid he can trick me with hello! cup your balls and go to a;sdlfkjaidvpaoijdof to chat with Ferraro #5!

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When I first started playing ret, I bound the spells on keys 1 through 5 so I can slide my finger back and forth...oh, what a huge nub I was.

Now I have transcended to the level of sustaining my dps just by looking at the keyboard. Don't concentrate on the finger, or you'll miss all that heavenly glory.

9 comments:

Arioch said...

Totally stealing that response to the spammer!

Xirella said...

HAI! U RIEK CATACRYSM ALFA?!?

I think it's funny that these kinds of phishing scams are still around. They're only really around because people actually fall for them, and then back up the character restoration process entire months.

And as far as DPS, I actually like touching my keyboard D: It's nice and soft against my face.

Hana said...

For a moment I thought that said Legplates of Flailing Light. :O

Sprink said...

Hana--

I read it as that at first too! ^_^

Joe said...

Flailing, failing, whatever. Those pants are sexy.

But the best part? They're sexy and NOT a skirt.

Juniper said...

So.That Hello Kitty button... is that your 'rip off shirt-instant win' trigger? Or is it just the bubble-hearth makro with a soundfile of some 2ne1 song?

gnomeaggedon said...

Mmm I thought it said Lightplate of spreading legs...

I think Jong's tailor must love him...

Tailor: "Hello Jong, what can I do for you today..."

The Man: "Progression raid tonight, might have to rip my shirt off 25 times... give me a pack of 50 to be sure"

Bell said...

Just a heads up, you shouldn't whisper spammers back. Some have IP scanning shiz that'll mess you up just as bad.

HP said...

Yah, I don't get why it's legplates of Failing Light. Didn't really think much about it till you pointed it out.

I wear them too! Am I fail?? =(

Grats on Anub TOGC kill!