Friday, October 30, 2009

happy friday

Hai gusy!

It's Friday, which means it's time to link achievements and loots that no one cares about!
We did it with zero death. I think there should be a title for zero death. Something like OMG It's. That way, I can be OMG It's Jong.

I got me this sexy time. It has way too much hit rating though. I LOVE hit rating, but this one has too much. It's like having too much bacon.
====================

I was defending the gold mine by myself. I tried to distract the enemies with the stormwind banner, but it didn't work.

I think Stormwind is my favorite city. I like it because the bank looks like a bank and the church looks like a church. Thunderbluff is stupid, because everything is a tent with three cows standing in it.
==============================================
When I went alliance, I chose human. Human racials are just so good. thpirit! woooo! Plus, I wanted to look like Uther.
Then I decided humans are boring, so I went dwarf.

Tell me that's not the sexiest ret pally you ever seen.

I miss being a belf. One thing I'm really glad about not being a belf is that I don't ever have to be associated with this guy again.


His name is fucking Fabioso the Fabulous. When I first saw this guy, I was running over to turn in the cooking daily, and I came to a complete stop. I had to stop, because I needed my whole body to hate him.

Wednesday, October 28, 2009

Did toc raid bug out for anyone else yesterday?

I wish there was a place I can fish near the tournament grounds so I'd have something to do while I wait for raid formation.

I flew down to Sindragosa's Fall and busted open one of them frozen lakes.

A group of nearby Wyrm Reanimators protested:

"Execuse me sir, you can't just..."

"Hey, why don't you look over there before I bust your head open?"

I had been fishing for about 15 minutes when two agents from The Icecrown Wildlife Conservation Commission arrived. I was cited for Fishing without License, Possession of Undersized Dragonfins, and Encroaching on Frostbrood Spawn Habitat.

EDIT:
I remember the story of boars my grandma told me long time ago. Boars have extreme tunnel vision. Once they zone in on the kill target, they're going after it. If a hungry boar smells out a mole under ground, he'll start digging until either he finds the mole or passes out of exhaustion. A plump, succulent deer could walk right by this determined boar; the boar will ignore the deer and keep digging for the original kill target.

Lesson learned: Don't be breaking the ice for undersized bass and getting citations from the local authorities. There's a ocean full of deer right over the cliff.

=======================

I wish they had a place to repair stuff. How am I supposed to repair if there were no engineers in my raid?

EDIT: "There's a goblin outside by a mini forge who will repair you so long as the floor still exists in ToC."

Why didn't somebody tell me about this goblin?

EDIT:

The value of engineering.

Hoff is an engineer and so if Rafa. They both pwn faces, so I can't talk smack about engineering. "Best" and "worst" are qualitative terms, so I won't use them to describe engineering.

What I can tell you with certainty is that for raiding ret pallies, engineering perks render the lowest DPS output among all crafting profession perks. Don't argue with me here. Just go with me.
========================

After we rolled the Northrend Beasts, I was getting really fired up.

"Comon' down Jaraxxus. You are the next contestant on I will Scuff You Up."

My nipples were tingling with insatiable fury and my inner pitbulls were flippin out rawr rawr rawr.... then we get this.

"AW COME ON! Dude, I just saw him outside continuing his endeavor to become a household word used to scare children into bed!"

"Calm down sir. Put your shirt back on. I don't know what to tell you, okay? Just put in a GM ticket."

The raid disbanded and everyone hearthed out.

Once again, I was left alone in the room with a major hard-on. It's not a feeling I'm not entirely unfaimiliar with, but still.

Monday, October 26, 2009

Break the Ice



"Unless it's jewelery, I don't want it."

--

I hate Hunter frosttraps.

Not because they can make you a sitting duck in a specific chokepoint in PVP, but because they don't let me drink as much Jack as I want to during Anub10 attempts. Anub10 makes me add ice to my glass, watering it down so I don't getouttacontrol.

Last night we were working on that terrible A Tribute to Repairbills achievement. 40 attempts left, lookin' good! OHNOES RAFA, spikes are chasing you!

No worries, I'll just kite around this patch of ice to eat up some time, and then at the la---what do you mean it's just a Hunter trap? 39 attempts.


So Blizz, please make Anub's icepatches look like giant SUV's from now on to avoid this confusion (and support my drinkinghabit), like so:



I had a flashback to Sapph25 in Naxx, where a a random totem ate up one of the three iceblocks that are supposed to form during airphase. A Mage in the middle of nowhere decided to Ice Block. I was also in the middle of nowhere and thought I was safe behind the Mage.

I should have relied on my training and instinct, no one is safe behind a Mage.

--

I've been trying to find ways to restore Jong to his former Blood Elf glory.

I suggested that he hosts a LVL1 Blood Elf Halloween bash sometime this coming weekend for his readers/fellow bloggers.

Everyone logs in with mysterious masked names like Hairioch and Belfwether and plays guessing games---once he sees everyone lookin' so F-A-B-O-L-O-U-S, he'll have a breakdown.

It'd be one of those ingame cutscene breakdowns, like you know where Arthas stabs the icyground with Frostedtipsmourne and ROOOOOOOOOOOOOAR.

Jong breaks out all glowyandshampooed into the air with his signature Pally Wings and Magichands---miraculously impregnating every single female character that happens to be nearby doing Argent Tourney dailies (unless their bags were full).

If that's a nogo, I'll have to resort to good ol' science and technology.

Braids and Rafa have been excellent guineapigs so far, but the experiments have only gone so far.

I can get Night Elf results, but not Blood Elf quite yet---it probably just requires less ice added. I'll figure it out and keep you guys updated.



Friday, October 23, 2009

What They Can't Take Away



"I'll look this way, you look the other way---that way we can see everything else but ourselves."

--

Hey guys, look at this.



Now that you've adjusted your monitor color like I have, that's called the Triple Threat from Newb Balance---they call it that because there are only 2 ways to fuck up a shoe design and they've managed to find 3.

It looks like what happens when an old pair of tiedye Converse gets really wasted and throws up on a pair of Keds.

Remember Keds? The sneaker you could just pop in the washer! Great idea guys, I've been walking on grass and dirt all day---lemme throw that shit in with my laceandsatin delicates, it'll be awesome. Look, if you wanted footprints on your ass, you coulda just came to me.

--

Triple Threat is a commonly used term to describe when someone fields multiple talents---often used for actors and athletes.

Dreamy Richard Gere? He can play the piano and sing/dance.

Quarterback Doug Flutie? He can pass, kick and run.

--

Are you really good at your class? Really? Like rlyrly? Just PVE? Just PVP? Just one spec? Just one role? Zz.

My twink Mage Ukyo (who's been on boring flowerpicking duty ever since they killed noXP queues) wasn't the original Mage I rolled. It was during Vanilla WoW and the Mage only made it to the mid LVL20's before I deleted it (I forget the name.. let's pretend it was a Gnome named Foamaggedon).

I wanted to learn how to kill a Mage. I memorized the cooldowns and the DRs of their control spells. I learned how to strafe kite with Cone of Cold and rank1 Frostbolt (back then downranking just for the faster cast time and cheap mana cost). I then logged back on my Rogue and started you know, killing Mages with extreme precision. Hell, I only rolled a Rogue because Braids was having a bitch of a time against them.

The game has been out for quite some time, and the mark of a good player will always be well grounded by the desire and discipline to learn. The thirst to constantly learn, to never settle with what you've already notched into your belt, the drive to master and add new tricks to your repertoire.

I'm stressing this because there might be a day where no one will play WoW and we'll all be blogging about some other game, or some other aspect of life even. What do you carry over then? Your gearscore? Your rotation? Nope, it's how you process and learn things that will be carried over.

A server can be shut down but they can't take that away from you. A patch can kill a spec but they can't take that away from you.

So I'll ask once more---are you like rlyrly good at your class? That's sweet. There's 2 other specs, and 9 other classes. There's PVE, PVP, Arena, AH, farming, RPing. Don't lie to yourself thinking you're done, you've beat the game---no one beats the game. The game beats you though if you've fallen into the trap of contentment and your thirst to learn is numbed.

Do yourself a favor, go learn something.

Thursday, October 22, 2009

World PvP and Arcane Mages

This started out as a comment to this post, but it got too long.

A buddy of mine plays on a PvP server. He would tell me storeis of world pvp that sweep back and forth between South Shore and Tarren Mill. There are hundreds covering the field and sometimes the zone will be locked-down for the whole weekend.

I only play on PvE servers and I had nothing to top his stories: "Uh...well, I finally got the Delicious Chocolate Cake reciepe!"

If I were to tell a pvp story, it'd be that one time from TBC.

It took place at the secluded Black Temple summoning stone.

The top Horde progression guild runs into its Alliance counterpart.

Tension builds as both sides are awaiting the arrival of the last few raiders.

Then there it was...


It was awesome, because it had all the ingredients of the most epic world pvp encounter:

1) Faction Pride!

2) Faction Pride + Guild Pride! The finest of the Horde vs. la creme de la creme of the Allinance.

3) Bunch of confused carebears wearing 100% PvE gears and having no clue how to PvP.
=======================

After Ari said "I'm going to have to put together an incanter's absorption spec," I had to google Incanter's Absorption, because I thought it was some nerdy cultural reference that went over my head.

Let me tell you, right now, the Arcane Mages are on Fire (<== Look! Look! I made a funny!). Holy jeebus they are wrecking faces. How's about 13k on twins hard mode, hmmmm?

I love when they go boom chicka boom and split into five. Then they go boom shaka laka shaka laka....

Oh, and get this. Last night, the Ballin' Mage housed me on Jaraxxus. You know, the fight with BUNCH of DEMONS running around? It's supposed to be my house.

So, I send him a quick tell.

Me: dubya tee eff? how are you outdpsing me on this fight?

Ballin' Mage: huh? oh, I can spell steal his stuff. it increase my damage a lot.

Word.

The Ballin' Mage is a really humble and nice guy too. After he made me look bad, he volunteered to sit out for another guildie who wanted drops from the last boss.

Ballin' Mage: I need to go find page 27 of Green Hills of Stranglethorn anyways. GL guys :D

Tuesday, October 20, 2009

Box 'n Matches



"Aw c'mon, we get to put on Blood Elf masks and eat candy---what could happen?"


--

Are you guys enjoying Hallow's End or whatever it's called? I'm not.

2 reasons.

One, having already finished all that achievementtitle bullshit, I now get to watch the masses lag up my Dalaran so bad with all the skellies, ghosts, lepers, wand selling and other nonsense. This wasn't so bad last year you know like in Shatt, a real city.

Dalaran is a crampedcubicle compared to Shatt. Do you guys throw wild Halloween parties in your cubicle? The Kirin (Wh)or should be ashamed of themselves---it took them 2 expansions to rebuild and raise Dalaran and what kind of realestate do they have to show for it.

A fucking box with some portals and a flightpoint.

--

Two, I feel bad for all cityvendors. Especially this guy:



Of course if you give out free candy by the bucket loads, things that are good for you take the backseat.

Braids and Rafa managed to walk by Applebough (with their whopping 3FPS) and he really shocked them. He had a matchbook in one hand, a look of desperation in his roots, and was mumbling to himself something incoherent.

Rafa tried to calm him down saying something like "it'll get better, have faith" and "Pilgrim's Week and Winter Veil will come soon, apple pie and cider will bring it back."

Braids was a little less patient---she said something like "you're fucked, kill yourself you sappy emotree" and "do it already so I can light my cigarette from your cinders."

The two ended up bickering and fighting.. and er, somehow in the scuffle the matchbook was immolated on fire, knocked out of Applebough's hand, landed on a nearby decorative pumpkin (setting it ablaze), which then was somehow kicked into several Wolvar children who shrieked and ran into the Alliance inn (tails on fire), crashing right into the bourbon and whiskey reserves on the nearend of the bar causing a minor explosion.

It took the full squad of the Kirin Tor firedepartment 2 hours (equipped with 11 Water Elementals) to control the fire. Tons of people were weeping for the injured. Braids wept for the alcohol that had been wasted.

Braids and Rafa aren't allowed to trick or treat in Dalaran ever again.

Sunday, October 18, 2009

I like Vigilance

Hai gusy!

Thanks to Ixobelle's leet html skills, I now have Posted by signature up top instead of down bottom. I like it. Isn't it such a subtle and elegant improvement to the page? I got the upgrade on Friday, but I haven't said anything, because I wanted to give you an opportunity to notice the change and compliment me on it.... It's now Sunday, and I can't believe none of you even care.

When you're wearing new perfume, I'll notice it and go, amg, is that Platinum Egoiste? Yes, I will. You know why? Because I care.
======================

I really like my new guild. There are several reasons, but I'll just tell you one thing. Hold on to your seats 'cause you're gonna cream your pants... Ready?

They always start the raid on time.

Yep yep. Not 7:15, not 7:05, not 7:01. They go at 7:00 PM zee dot. Plus, they have tabard and guild bank. Working on vent. Hoping to raid end game contents soon.

Oh, you know what's really interesting? They cleared everything in wotlk with warrior tanks. Both the MT and the primary OT are warriors. Cat druid goes bear on 3-tank fights.

Bring the player not the class!

The other day, one of the tanks put Vigilance on me and I almost cried. Vigilance goes pe-kiiiiiing and I love that sound. It's the sound of ultimate respect.

Warrior Tank: Hey Jong, your dps is so uber leet, I'd like some of that threat transferred to me.

Jong: Shaddup... just shaddup...you had me at pe-kiiiing. You had me at pe-kiiiiing.


...and then he took it away next fight and gave it to another ret pally. Stop playing games with my heart.
==========================

Check out the top dps on hodir fast kill.

Twenty five thousand. Them mages are dishing out insane dps and I LOVE IT. You know why? Because they're on my team. If they're powerful, they help me win. When I blow past everybody on jaraxxus, they whisper me, hey nice deeps buddy. They're happy. You know why? Because, when I own, I help them win. PvE'ers who call for nerf to other classes seriously boggle my mind... fucking hybrids! nerf them! .... Hey dummy, we're on the same team, remember?
========================
This is an old screen shot of my signature battle cry:
I thought this was hilarious: Hooray! Good job guys! Just hold on for another 10 seconds! 10.... 9.... 8... pewwwwwwwww KABOOM.
Seriously blizzard, take away the unsportmanlike conduct pussy pally bubble.

This one, I think we were talking about add-ons:

Thursday, October 15, 2009

You Know I Used to be a Warlock



"I was scared for a moment, but then realized I could just faceroll twice as good."

--

This is largely a throwaway post, I'm crunched for time. But it's an excuse to link my armories 'cause some of Jong's readership might not be familiar with my past.

You know I used to be a Warlock?

Braids unfortunately was relegated to alt status when WOTLK hit (even though she hit LVL80 first), but she has and always will be my favorite. I do casual Arena/PVP on the side when I find the time (hit 1800+ for S6) and the only PVE I can muster on her is selling Steamy Romance Novels on the AH---because taking money from perverts is always HEROIC and doesn't require a gearscore.

--

You know I used to be the fucking Hero of Orgrimmar?



It doesn't matter if Rafa is Alliance and Org is Horde. Org loves her like Anub loves fat kids eating cake who run slow during the burrowphase.

It's just how like Jong, even though he's Alliance and Human now, will still be sleeping with Blood Elf chicks from all over 'til he dies (of some disease). It's not Ret BE DPS, it's Ret BED PST.

Rafa is so loved as Org's hero, whenever she goes in there through the front gates she's swarmed by her fans---they won't leave her alone. It's an exhausting thing really being starinthespotlight, can't go anywhere without being followed. When she went in there during the Midsummer Festival to give her Hero's blessing on the city fire, she had to break off to the Auction House to try and buy Health pots---there was a misunderstanding and a slight scuffle with the auctioneers that made the tabloids.

I don't recall what spec/gear I logged her out with, but she's largely a Holy Pally Healing Bot these days..

--

Volvo Driving Soccer Mom by Everclear (embedding disabled by request)

//[na na, na na, na na, na na]

//you know I used to be a Warlock
//I got busy in the Basin and I Soulshard farm
//ya I used to summon Night Elves at the local Succ Club
//but now I know, my Light wings from my wrong

//ya ya
//I really used to be a Ret girl
//I had a 3's team with sir Uther and his Prot friend Tom
//I know I used to be a real Loot Whore
//but now I am, a Holy Pally Healing Bot

//[na na, na na, na na, na na] Holy Pally Healing Bot
//[na na, na na, na na, na na]

//I really used to be a Warlock
//I got busted through possession of my Healthstone laced stash
//I used to love to Fear the things they tell me not to Fear
//but now I'm different, now I spam a Light Flash

//I really used to be a Ret girl
//I got fucked in Arena if SO-COM didn't proc
//yes I used to be a real Loot Whore
//but now I am, a Holy Pally Healing Bot

//[na na, na na, na na, na na] Holy Pally Healing Bot
//[na na, na na, na na, na na] Holy Pally Healing Bot
//[na na, na na, na na, na na] Holy Pally Healing Bot
//[na na, na na, na na, na na] Holy Pally Healing Bot

//woa woa, woa woa
//[where do all] where do all the Rerolls go
//when the Patch goes down [goes down]
//[I wonder where] I wonder where all the Facerolls go
//cause when ya have 'em they are nerfed to the ground

//I think they moved out to the Abbey
//and now they're Grid bound, middle class, Blizzpublican whines
//they all have Grid bound, middle class, Blizzpublican keybinds
//Grid bound, middle class, Blizzpublican lives

//where do all the Rerolls go
//when the Patch goes down [goes down]
//I think I know where all the Facerolls go
//now become, Holy Pally Healing Bot

//[na na, na na, na na, na na] Holy Pally Healing Bot
//[na na, na na, na na, na na] Holy Pally Healing Bot
//[na na, na na, na na, na na] Holy Pally Healing Bot
//[na na, na na, na na, na na] Holy Pally Healing Bot

//[na na, na na, na na, na na]
//[na na, na na, na na, na na] Holy Pally Healing Bot

Tuesday, October 13, 2009

Poker Faces and Lying Games



"MUM-MUM-MUM-MAH BLOOD ELF P-P-P-POKER FASE."


--

When Jong told me that he factionchanged his superpopstar Pally from Blood Elf to Human, my panties dried up and a little of me died inside.

Don't get me wrong, Alliance is cool---and I'm Alliance as it comes, not one of those apologetic Alliance. To put another way:

I'm Alliance when things are going perfect, when we're winning the BG, Mage tables give nothing but candyandicecream, and every chest opens up revealing giftcertificates to Coach and Sephora.

I'm also Alliance when things suck, when we're losing the BG, when this Healthstone just fucked my calorie intake for the day, and everyone is blaming it on 12yr olds ruining the faction.


First of all, I never understood bashing 12yr olds with anything to do about winning/losing. 12yr olds don't make your faction lose, losers do. And unfortunately for the human race, losers can be any age.

This girl Momoka is a winner---she was 10 when she danced along to one of my fav Korean popsongs, 10! She's apparently 11 now and a synchroswimmer---and let me tell you when she hits 12, I'm going to send her an invite and we'll assault Blacksmith together through the waterside while the losers are still fighting on the bridge.

She's Asian, which probably means I'll have about 1 year of her on my Arena team before she has to quit and go fulltime into medicalschool because her parents may turn out to be ACHIEVMENTWHORES.

DISCLAIMER: Please note that she's an underage Asian girl in shorts, so if you're at work and someone catches you watching it, hope you either mumummummah p-p-p-pokerface like a pro or been sleeping with someone in the HR department.



You go girl.

Secondly, most factionchanges are spurred on by the "me vs them" impulse. And I don't mean Alliance versus Horde, but Alliance versus Alliance and Horde versus Horde.

Ever catch yourself (or hear someone else) saying, "well, the Alliance on this server suck" or "the Horde in this cluster can't win a single EOTS". This is a lying game.

If you're Alliance and you said the former, you are lying to yourself and trying to separate yourself from the Alliance---there's the "me" Alliance (notsuck) and the "them" Alliance (suck).

If you're Horde and you said the latter, you are lying to yourself and trying to separate yourself from the Horde---there's the "me" Horde (the one that can win EOTS) and the "them" Horde (always lose EOTS).

Well dear, that's a nice try, but you can't separate from your faction (well you can with $, but you just get thrown into the other faction). If your faction sucks on a particular server/cluster/whatever, it's probably because of you (don't I sugarcoat things so well).

Huh, me?
Yes, you.

No one likes to say something like the following:

"Hey, this shit is probably my fault---this faction sucks because I suck as a member of it. I have a shitty attitude, am terrible at learning mechanics and tactics, and don't have a spine. I have pride but it's not the sort of pride that raises the faction up when I win because I'll take credit for the win for my ego. When I lose, the faction can take the fall, it's all 12yr olds anyway."


Hardly anyone easily (and freely) says that sort of thing, it's the type of revelation that has to be surgically operated on by your peers, by strangers, by enemies (or maybe by Momoka MD in the future if she's not in the pool).

And because you don't like admitting it, it's easy to see how there are so many other people doing the exact same thing---every single person trying to separate "me versus them", playing their own little lying game where you fall into their own "them" category. That makes for a shitty faction, made loosely up of a lot of people under 1 banner with no integrity, character or comradeship to support it up.

--

What's worse is that it's not just a faction exclusive thing, it happens in every aspect of WoW and of life.

This PUG raid is fail!---well, if you're in it then you fail too, you're not treated separately when it's only convenient for your ego. And while the pug might fail once in getting the raid content, you failed twice, 1) for failing raid content and 2) failing yourself because you're still playing the lying game.

This country is fail!---and so on, you get the idea.

Monday, October 12, 2009

Miley, grant my mortal allies the power of thunder

I never eat vegetables on purpose. I'll eat it if it happens to get in the way of whatever I'm stuffing my face with. I'll eat the lettuce on cheeseburger and chopped onions on nacho supreme.

I treat achievement points the way I treat vegetables. I don't mind achieving things by accident, but I get easily frustrated going after points that render no direct benefits to my dps.

If blizzard gave us, let's say, 1 Attack Power for every 100 acievement points, I would man-whore my heart out getting every achievement out there. But since they're just points, I dunn care.
====================

A few months ago, I thought the only 1 Light in the Darkness I'd ever see is the Princess Garden.


Last night, we got us new rides.

Here are the key points I took from the fight:

1) Let hatred and rage guide your blows. Yogg is a mean fucker. I already feel inadquate for bouncing on them clouds like snuggles fabric softener commerical bear. Why does he have to step on my self-esteem with hurtful condescending remarks?-- Weak minded fool!

2) Give no pause to your attacks.

3) Don't stop believing. More importantly, hold on to that feeling.

Wednesday, October 7, 2009

Remember Me?



"Because apparently, inside everyone is a Blood Elf with Chanel Aviators just dying to get out."

--

Remember me?

If you don't, that's cool. Thorim remembers.



When Jong asked me if I was still interested in guest blogging once in awhile, he said, "Megs, I have 3 simple rules for you to follow."

Let's check them out:

1) This is FORBEARANCE, not outofmana (he really used all caps for his blog title and lowercase for mine, an obvious powerplay), which means no posting stupid songs or loudyoutubevideos that might get my readers fired.

2) You must start all of your posts with a banner/header of some sort to signify that it's you, not the illestretpally alive (upon saying "illestretpally" he did a Divine Storm IRL and almost knocked over a pregnant woman) that is posting to avoid any confusion.

The banner must be followed by some insightful virtuous saying or teaching, because here at FORBEARANCE (he did it again) we try to instill wisdom and lifelessons to our readers instead of that debaucheryandwhoring style of blogging that you sinfully are used to (no Jong, tell me how you really feel, don't hold back).

3) Never make fun of me.


--

So, now that I've broken all 3 rules in the matter of minutes, I'd just like to say hihi to Jong's readership base.

What to expect from my guest posts? Nothing much---my time is limited still (which is why I quit blogging in the first place) so I'm planning 2 random posts per week.

2 is a solid figure in planning. Usually you plan to have only 2 drinks, plan to only drink 2x a week, plan to only sleep with 2 strangers at one time (waitwut)---and we all know how those plans tend to work out.

2 in planning is usually like 3 in rules, BAHROKEN.

Sunday, October 4, 2009

Purple Pixels

The human body, when completely decomposed into chemicals and minerals, is worth less than one dollar.

If I were to cash out all the carbon, hydrogen, calcium, sodium, magnesium, etc. out of my body, I would need another 19 cents to buy me a Fruit & Yogurt Parfait off McDonald's dollar menu.

However, if you were to fearfully and wonderfully structure those worthless components into Jong, I am the illest ret pally, your favorite blogger, and my mom's precious loving son. I am priceless.

You see, the value is in structure, not components.
=======================================

Some time ago, I tried to tell myself that it's just purple pixels. Come on, let's be mature; it's just purple pixels. Still, for some reason, I continued to feel uncontrollable despair, injustice and anger when the ubber epic drop I've been after for so long went to someone less deserving of its glory.

Why do I feel this way? It's just purple pixels, isn't it?

After attending Dr. Phil's seminar, Relationship Rescue, I realzed that my attitude toward epic loots were extremely unhealthy.

He told me that the first step in becoming a classy looter is to admit to myself that it's not just purple pixels. When those meaningless pixels come together to form Justicebringer, it's no longer just pixels. It's my Justice Bringer. My Show Stopper. My Hope Ender. My Dream Weaver!

As I was coming to closure with my suppressed desires, I began to weep uncontrollably. Dr. Phil comforted me with his burly arm and galvinized my heart with his words: "It's okay buddy. It's natural to want it that badly. Furthermore, it is important to admit your feelings, because then and only then can you truly tell your friend Johnny, Hey Johnny, I really want the axe, but I want you to have it, because you're more important to me than the axe."