Wednesday, June 3, 2009

Yesterday was king of all fail maintenance Tuesdays

It was 9 pm and my server was still busted. The raid was cancelled. I was really upset because I was all fired up to go. I checked the guild twitter, and apparently, the whole guild re-rolled death knights on Azgalor. If you saw bunch of idiots running around the dk starting area, that was us.

I didn’t wanna play dk, so I rolled a dwarf paladin on Megan’s server. She was in ulduar so I picked up herbalism and started herbing the crap out of dun morg. I tell you, I didn’t realize the extent of male belf suckfest until I tried dwarf. The jazz hands casting animation is one thing. I can’t stand belf Brian Littrell fumanchoo pissant chin hair. When my dwarf eats soup, soup gets all over my luscious beard, and I don’t even wipe it off, because I love it.

Being a lvl 5 scrub pally no one knows was a nice pace of change. When I’m on Jong, I can’t even go to Ice Crown to do the dailies because all the scourge minion teeny bopper groupies be zerging me to get their nipples signed. OMG OMG it’s really him!

Anyhow, I saw Megan’s paladin in person and I was really excited. Her raiding spec is holy, but her off-spec pvp ret gears are better than all your gears and all your mom’s gears combined. She got the Furious Mace of PvE Ret Pally Self-esteem Obliteration. It was gemed with [Bold Show Time] and [Rigid Let’s Go].

Speaking of pvp ret gears, have you seen this PvP Ret Pally BiS Gear List? I think Ferraro proudly put this together before she resigned from retpalaind.com. I’m just wondering if I’m the only one who finds the concept of pvp ret pally BiS gear list absolutely hilarious.

Ferraro: “So, the PvP Ret Pally BiS Gear List is as follows… head: furious, shoulders: furious, chest: furious, legs: furious, belt: furious, boots: …”

Me: “Wait, wait, let me guess… errrm… furious?”

Ferraro: “Yes! How did you know? Furious boots are better than hateful boots.”

7 comments:

Raxerzk said...

Hey buddy.

Sassafras said...

Did you do one of those big full santa claus style beards? Because they save the most soup for later.

Sprink of Archimonde said...

Inspired by your learning of the enemy, I really wanted to log and play my alliance toons last nite... only to find that even today, Thorium Brotherhood is down. And Archimonde went down shortly after gathering my mail on Sprink, so I spent half the night on my sister's server playing my shaman, and once Archimonde came back up, spending my evening with the loverly paladin Tirralyis.

... but I really wanna play my Alliance Druid. ~pouts~

gnomeaggedon said...

May the Braids be with you...

Not against you.

Shifttusk said...

"May the Braids be with you...

Not against you."

Fkin A right!

Good read! I finally swapped my paladin's dual spec to ret and started picking up a ret set for dailies and i guess maybe some bgs. I too am going to buy the ret mace of face smashing ! I unfortionately purchased the jazz hands mace first since I'm pretty sure my DK partner would eat my soul if I didn't.

Averna said...

Jong:

I started a blood elf male on Kalecgos. His name is Amigawd.

Every time I play him, I think of you. It's awesome.

Anonymous said...

Jong, my love, where have you been? I'm having withdrawls.