Friday, June 26, 2009

Romance of the Three Kingdoms: Zhang Fei

I’d like to dedicate this post to Razor, a strategist extraordinaire and a vibrant leader of the most awesome guild on the guild land.

Dear Razor

I had been one of your best raiders. Still, if you asked me to sit outside Ulduar and draw unicorns on my penis while the rest of the guild was having a blast getting cool achievements, I would have done exactly like you had told me without a question. I trust you that much.

Did you ever know that you were my hero and the wind beneath my wings?


Long live the mighty Weight Watchers 2007-2009

Romance of the Three Kingdoms, a 14th century Chinese historical novel, is by far the most widely read literature of all time across China, Japan, and Korea.

The novel, based on events during the turbulent years of the Three Kingdom era of China, has countless number of secondary stories that are referenced time and again in modern business school text books and fathers’ life’s lesson stories to sons.

Here's a story from the novel I'd like to share with you:

Liu Bei, a determined young man and a latter-day emperor of one of the Three Kingdoms, is about to set forth on a long journey to find people he can trust and work with.

His mother offers him the [Legendary Sword of Blazing Pimp Mojo], a priceless family heirloom.

“Son, use this sword wisely. Deliver this nation out of confusion and chaos.”

Several months later, Liu Bei returned home without the sword.

“Welcome home son, but where is the sword?”

“I gave it to a man I met.”

“OMG you failsauce! Do you know how much that sword is worth?”

“Yes mother, but the man I met was worth more than thousand legendary swords. I wanted to work with him and offered the sword to him as a token of my recognition and respect.”

The man Liu Bei is referring to is Zhang Fei, a belligerent drunk wreaking havoc in town pubs, who eventually swears allegiance to Liu Bei with his blood and becomes one of the five greatest generals of the era.

Everyone feared and hated Zhang Fei. Liu Bei was the only one who recognized his potential and brought out the best in him.

I started raiding with Weight Watchers at the beginning of WotLK. I was the nervous new guy from a small family guild trying to fit into the big boy’s league. Razor was the GM of one of the most well-respected guild on the server.

It had been only a month into the expansion and everyone was still racing to clear the four wings of Naxx.

40 minutes to raid time. I was hungry, so I fixed me a good looking sandwich and stuffed my face in 5 minutes. I get sleepy when I’m full…plus the week’s schedule has been pretty intense… I’ll take a quick nap before the raid.

I woke up 3 hours later with the sandwich platter still on my lap and potato chips strewn all over the couch. I quickly log back in and send a quick tell to Razor to apologize. He laughs. Then he linked me Zeliek’s Guantlets, the best BoE plate dps gloves available at the time.

“Do you want it?”

“It’s really nice, but I don’t deserve it.”

A few minutes later, Razor ran over to me, opened trade, and gave me the gloves. It was already gemmed AND enchanted.

“Take it man. It’s yours.”

Razor made an emotional investment into a silly small-town ret pally no one cared about… that scrub ret pally swore allegiance to him and later became the illest plate dps in all Northrend.

We'll miss you razor. Thanks for all the hard work you put into the guild's success.


Morphy of Galakrond said...

Props to Razor for recognizing the epic diamond in the ruff. So where is Razor going?

Sprink said...

Aww, that story made me want to cry. /hug

Arioch said...

I can't get past the mental image of the ret pally on the steps of Ulduar with his pants down, a Sharpie marker in one hand and his penis in the other.

The sad thing? I don't think I'm disturbed by this.

Ixobelle said...

romance of the three kingdoms is a nintendo game. I think you have your facts mixed up, sir.

HP said...

Ooh, romance of the 3 kingdoms... I always wanted to know the complete story but I keep coming across different versions... I guess that's what I get for not wanting to hear the dry cut, historical version.

I love the Liu Bei-Zhang Fei comparison, it's so random yet precisely illustrates what you want to get across.

Best of luck to Razor in his RL endeavors

zOgre said...

@Ixobelle - Romance of the 3 Kingdoms is a series of Chinese legends compiled into an ancient novel that a nintendo game was based on.

Knowing is half the battle - violence is the other half.

Shine on, you crazy diamond.

Ixobelle said...

um, no. it's just a nintendo game. You, wikipedia, and the rest of the planet are just WRONG, k?

ByStander said...

Awesome Jong, you made it as if Razor is going to a far far place and never to be seen again? RIP Razor?