I can't tell you how excited I was to get a permanent kid to hang out with me. I'm gonna teach him everything I know so he can be a face wrecking juggernaut like me when he grows up. He's gonna be an insane arms warrior with 2300 arena rating.
I daydream a lot. One of the recurring scenario is where I'm chillin in a champagne room of a highly exclusive nightclub in nyc inappropriately fondling Adriana Lima's boobies. Montecristo torpeto #22 on one hand, kettle one martini on the other.
The other scenario is where I'm swimming in money like Scrooge McDuck and I don't know what to do with my billions. Except I know exactly what to do with my money.
1) Buy bunch of islands east of Africa near Mauritius. Register the territory to be a country under the name of Republic of the Jong. We're gonna sign up for Olympics and stuff. London 2012, here we come!
2) Start a hedge fund to establish a permanent stream of obnoxious sums of money. There will be two funds under the management. Cowboy Giddy Up Fund (CBGF) will be proactively managed for positive alpha. I'm gonna hire the entire Elitist Jerks staff as my quantitative analysts. For Dart Throwing Monkey Fund (DTMF), I'll hire bunch of monkeys. I'll blind-fold them and have them throw darts at the financial pages of the Wall Street Journal. Whatever the monkeys pick, we buy.
3) I'll hire all my sexy readers. All of you. Your job is to sit there, eat bon bons, and play wow with me. Your salary? 250K USD plus performance-based bonus that scales with your achivement points and Attack Power. We'll raid Ulduar and run premade AVs.
4) BRK, Resto4Life, and OOM will be back. They'll be required to log 20 hours of playing time per week. They'll also be required to travel the world on a personal jet with unlimited expense accounts so they get exposed to lots of things and get ideas for lots of fun interesting blogs.
5) I'm also gonna hire a group of 5 people or so... I don't know what to call this group, but their job is to sit there and think of nice things to say to me (e.g., OMG Jong, you smell so nice today!)